How many of us at times become very frustrated in our marriages? Probably, if we were all honest, we all have been VERY frustrated, many, many times. Sometimes it gets to the point where we just want to give it all up! I know that in my own marriage many times I thought that if HE would only change then things would be better... I didn't look at how I could change to make things better. Let's look at this from a different angle...
I was talking to someone recently and she was commenting on the fact that many times her husband didn't tell the truth to her. Now I don't think it was about major things.. lets assume it wasn't. She mentioned that she had asked him to pay a bill... he said he would... she asked hime again if he had... he said he did... then she found out that he hadn't paid the bill. I don't know all the ins and outs of this scenerio so I am going to just use this incident as an example.
Does this wife habitually nag and fuss at her husband? Does she criticize him about the way he does or doesn't do things? You know, he may have had a lot on his mind and just forgot to pay that bill. Then when she asked him again if he had paid it, he mentally weighed his options.... "Which is better, for me to tell the truth and have her fuss and yell at me because I forgot, or for me to not tell the truth and say I paid it, even though I didn't. I can go pay it real soon and she will not know."
I am not saying that the husband should not be honest, he should always tell the truth. However, if she is constantly on his case, he might think that lying is the lesser of two evils! We, as wives, can do our part in keeping a marriage in harmony by biting our tongues when we catch ourselves starting to fuss and nag!
Lets try this scenerio instead.... There's a bill to be paid. The wife comes to the husband and says," Honey, I know you are busy, but do you think you could pay this bill that is due? It needs to be paid right away!"
He responds,"Sure, I will try to remember to do it tomorrow."
She says," Thanks, I will call you to remind you, just in case you forget."
Guess what? I bet he remembers!... but just in case, she can call an jog his memory and there is no conflict.
Did I always do this? NO! I wish I could say that I did, but I too often failed. It would help to create a peaceful happy home if we, as wives, remember to do our part in communicating with our husbands.
Just a thought.....
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
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